Do you feel like a glutton for punishment?
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Signs That You Are a Lousy Girlfriend:
 
1. You feel as though you care more than your boyfriend, partner, or spouse can reciprocate.
 
2. While apart, you send meaningful text messages during the course of the day so he can not forget that you are busy loving him.
 
3. When he returns home, after a night spent with "the guys", you subtlely (or not so subtlely) interrogate him, listening for contradictions in the retelling of the evening's events.
 
4. You're no longer interested in hearing about his day. You only want to know if he encountered any females (and you hope, if they were not disfigured, they were, at least, unattractive).
 
5. His celebrity crushes hurt your feelings.
 
6. Everything he says, short of expressing the most heartfelt sentiments of love and adoration, hurts your feelings, because nothing he says FEELS like "enough."
 
7. Missing or ignoring one of his incoming calls is unthinkable.
 
8. You dump him, repeatedly and often, hoping the action will bring about desired results. Some days, while rethinking the value of the relationship, you decide it's simply not worth the energy and inner turmoil. That's it- you're through with that man! Then, you remember his better qualities and come to the conclusion that you'll hang in there, after all. Maybe you repeat this process a dozen times. Meanwhile, he is not even aware of the fact that you two have broken up and made up, in his absence.  
 
9. You check his Myspace profile frequently to see which new friends have been added and if they have left revealing new comments.You KNOW that he's truly a black-hearted wolf in sheeps clothing, just looking for an opportunity to get away with whatever possible....like all the rest.
 
10. You have become half the person you were before your boyfriend entered the picture. Your hobbies have changed, or disappeared entirely. Your routine now consists of waiting to hear from him, waiting to see him, or trying to catch him in a lie.
 
11. Despite his constant presence and his unwavering insistance otherwise, you are convinced he is biding his time until he can secure a way out of the relationship.
 
12. You find yourself irritating and annoying.
 
13. You miss him, even when he's sitting on the couch beside you or calling on the phone.
 
14. His friends might have refered to you, at one point, as a "psycho-bitch."
 
15. He has provided the passwords to his cell and email accounts, but you are certain hidden accounts exist.
 
 
 

Why He Seems Like a Lame Boyfriend:

 

1. He was far more attentive when you first started dating. Now, he lets some of your calls transfer to voicemail. He enjoys time spent away from you. His feelings have changed. He's changed.

 

2. When another call comes in, he promises to call you back in ten minutes. The phone rings in three hours.

 

3. He's afraid to tell you EVERYTHING. Or anything.

 

4. He isn't turned off by the sight of other women's breasts, legs, or body parts, and he should be!

 

5. He tells you that you "think too much." You think you simply care.

 

6. He would rather play golf, watch sports, or do yardwork than have a conversation, lasting all day, about "where things stand" in the relationship.

 

7. He does not seem to be as interested in sex. You're not, either, but he should at least try to "get some."

 

8. He's friendly with his ex girlfriends. Any amount of friendliness is considered overly-friendly.

 

9. Not all of your text messages are deemed important enough to save.

 

10. Halle Berry gives him "thoughts." It's possible he is having those thoughts when intimate moments mandate he thinks only of you.

 

11. He no longer puts forth the effort to win you back when you have dumped him. Again. He responds with, "Okay. If that's the way you feel...good luck!"

 

12. He never looks at your Myspace profile.

 

13. He rarely expresses jealousy, insecurity, or fear of loss. He takes you for granted.

 

14. When your feelings are injured, when you are blue or simply having an "off" day, he does not clear his social calendar or drop everything else to rush home and comfort you.

 

15. For a period of time, he professed to love you "soooo much" every half hour, now he loves you a bit more quickly as he's hanging up the phone. "Love you, bye!"